The Dual Impact of Parent–Child Discrepancies in Perceived Closeness: Immediate Emotional and Physiological Costs and Long-Term Behavioural Adaptation

Parent‒child perceptual discrepancies can shape children’s development, yet their real-time effects and long-term implications remain unclear. Examining 88 Chinese parent–child dyads (M_{age_child} = 8.07, SD = 1.16, 57.95% boys), this study investigated how (in)congruence in perceived closeness relates to real-time dyadic affects, child parasympathetic regulation, assessed between July to October 2021 (T1), and concurrent (T1) and prospective internalizing/externalizing problems, measured one year later (T2). Polynomial regression and response surface analyses revealed that when children perceived greater closeness than their parents did, they exhibited and shared more positive affect with their parents. Incongruence was linked to poorer parasympathetic regulation but lower long-term externalizing problems. Congruence in low closeness was associated with more internalizing/externalizing problems. Findings highlight the immediate physiological costs of incongruence and its potential benefits for children’s long-term behavioral adaptation.