Love and control: Self-criticism in parents and daughters and perceptions of relationship partners

Abstract

The role of self-criticism in parenting behaviors and the impact of these behaviors on daughters’ own levels of self-criticism, depression, and perceptions of romantic partners were investigated. Parents provided information on their levels of self-criticism (DEQ; Blatt, D’Afflitti, & Quinlan, 1976) and parenting styles (SASB; Benjamin, 1974). Their daughters completed questionnaires assessing their level of self-criticism, depression (BDI-II; Beck, 1996), and the interpersonal style of their boyfriends. Structural equation modeling indicated self-critical mothers and fathers reported being less loving and more controlling with their daughters, which predicted self-criticism in daughters. Self-criticism in daughters, in turn, was associated with increased depression and perceptions of boyfriends as being less loving and more controlling. These results support the concept of parental influences on internal working models and their consequent impact on interpersonal functioning (Andrews, 1989, Benjamin, 1974).

Introduction

Self-criticism has received increased attention as a marker for vulnerability to depression and other psychological disorders in adolescents and adults (Blatt, Hart, Quinlan, Leadbeater, & Auerbach, 1993). As discussed by Blatt and colleagues (e.g., Blatt, Quinlan, Chevron, McDonald, & Zuroff, 1982), this personality style is associated with fragile self-esteem and fear of failure and scrutiny from others. Self-criticism is hypothesized to develop in individuals with cold, rejecting, and controlling parents who make their love contingent on their child’s achievements (Blatt and Shichman, 1983, McCranie and Bass, 1984). This personality style is implicated in poor personal and social functioning throughout adolescence and adulthood (for a review, see Blatt, 2004, Zuroff et al., 2005). Building on theoretical and empirical literature, the present research uses structural equation modeling to investigate whether negative parenting behaviors of self-critics would predict self-criticism in daughters and perceptions of maladaptive behaviors of their romantic partners.

Self-criticism appears to originate, in part, through experiences with critical, rejecting parents displaying inconsistent love (Koestner et al., 1991, McCranie and Bass, 1984, Thompson and Zuroff, 1999, Whiffen and Sasseville, 1991). Children are postulated to internalize these experiences to form negative internal working models of self, other, and self-other relationships, which influence subsequent interpersonal interactions (e.g., Baldwin, 1992, Blatt and Homann, 1992). Maladaptive social relations then perpetuate negative representations of self and others and may contribute to the maintenance of self-criticism (Andrews, 1989), which, according to longitudinal research, is highly stable (r = .57, p < .01) in females from age 12 to 31 (Koestner et al., 1991) and is associated with personal and interpersonal dissatisfaction and maladjustment throughout this period (Zuroff, Koestner, & Powers, 1994).

Self-critics’ negative childhood experiences thus seem to contribute to a pattern of entering, creating, or manipulating subsequent interpersonal environments in ways that perpetuate their negative self-image and increase vulnerability to depression (for a review of relevant literature, see Shahar et al., 2004, Zuroff et al., 2004). Empirical support for this unconscious, self-fulfilling feedback loop (Andrews, 1989) comes from Swann and colleagues, who argue that such dynamics help increase one’s sense of intrapsychic and interpersonal prediction and control (for a review, see Giesler et al., 1999).

These negative interpersonal cycles may also extend to parent–child relationships. For example, Thompson and Zuroff (1998) reported that self-critical mothers provided more negative feedback and were more controlling and punitive of their adolescent daughters. More recently, Besser and Priel (2005) investigated personality vulnerabilities, depression, and attachment styles among three-generation triads of women. They found not only that insecurely attached, self-critical mothers were vulnerable to depression, but also that maternal depression might lead to daughters’ insecure attachment, which can consequently contribute to self-criticism and depression (Besser & Priel, 2005). Such findings suggest that self-criticism does not merely continue from childhood into later years, but can also be passed on to future generations through negative parenting behaviors with one’s children.

Building on previous studies of inter-generational transmission of maladaptive personal and interpersonal functioning (e.g., Besser & Priel, 2005), the current research used Structural Equation Modeling (SEM) to investigate relationships between levels of self-criticism in parents (assessed with the DEQ; Blatt et al., 1976) and their reports of parenting behaviors toward their daughter (evaluated with the structural analysis of social behavior SASB; Benjamin, 1974). It was predicted that higher levels of self-criticism in parents would be associated with self-reports of more controlling and less loving parenting (Thompson & Zuroff, 1998). Parenting behaviors, in turn, were expected to relate to levels of self-criticism in daughters. Specifically, more controlling and less loving parenting was predicted to relate to higher levels of self-reported self-criticism and greater depressed mood in daughters (Thompson & Zuroff, 1999). Finally, in line with literature on internal working models (Baldwin, 1992), higher levels of self-criticism in daughters were expected to entail perceptions of boyfriends as more controlling and less loving (Zuroff & de Lorimier, 1989) on the SASB, similar to what they had experienced with their parents.

One possible confound in the study is the relationship between self-criticism and depressed mood. That is, a self-critical woman’s reports of negative behaviors from her boyfriend could reflect a depressive bias (Lewinsohn & Rosenbaum, 1987). Conversely, a cold and controlling boyfriend could contribute to a woman’s level of depression. Therefore, associations among daughter’s self-criticism, depressed mood, and perceptions of romantic partners were examined without a priori assumptions about causal relationships between the latter two variables.