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‘My Eyes Were Open’: Awakened Maternal Identity and Leaving Violent Relationships for the Infant/Children

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Abstract

A qualitative secondary analysis explored stories of mothers (n = 49) who left violent relationships (VRs) through a lens of maternal identity. Constant comparative method identified a theory of Awakened Maternal Identity (AMI) and Leaving VR for the Infant/Children. Mothers described how the VR diminished their maternal identity (DMI). Partners controlled the VR though unrealistic infant care expectations, criticisms of infant care, harsh parenting, and control over mothering decisions. DMI lowered the mother’s capacity to provide emotionally nurturing infant care. Over time, mothers experienced AMI- as their ‘eyes were opened’ they experienced a stronger sense of mothering responsibility, focused more on the infants and children, and eventually prioritized their relationship with the infants and children over the partner. AMI seemed a turning point that led to leaving the VR for the infants/children. Recommendations offered for professionals to foster AMI as potential means to initiate the leaving VRs.

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Acknowledgments

Miriam Stewart PhD RN FCAHS FRSC of University of Alberta, Carmen Gill PhD of University of New Brunswick and Kim Critchley PhD RN of University of Calgary Grant Support: Canadian Institutes of Health Research.

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Authors and Affiliations

  1. Faculty of Nursing, University of New Brunswick, 221 MacLaggan Hall, 33 Dineen Dr., P.O. Box. 4000, Fredericton, NB, Canada

    Loretta Secco

  2. University of Calgary, Calgary, AB, Canada

    Nicole Letourneau

  3. Advanced Standing Program, University of New Brunswick, 221 MacLaggan Hall, 33 Dineen Dr., P.O. Box. 4000, Fredericton, NB, Canada

    Erin Collins

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  1. Loretta Secco
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  2. Nicole Letourneau
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  3. Erin Collins
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Correspondence to Loretta Secco.

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Secco, L., Letourneau, N. & Collins, E. ‘My Eyes Were Open’: Awakened Maternal Identity and Leaving Violent Relationships for the Infant/Children. J Fam Viol 31, 639–645 (2016). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10896-016-9799-x

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