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Looking Back on Childhood: Women’s Experience of Triangulation in the Context of Domestic Violence

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Abstract

This article focuses on women’s recollections of being triangulated in their parents’ relationship within the context of domestic violence. Fifteen women were interviewed as part of a larger grounded theory study that looked into the women’s understanding of their childhood experiences of domestic violence and their impact on their individual development and their intimate relationships. The women spoke about how difficult it was for them not to take sides in their parents’ conflicts. Some actively chose to put themselves in the middle of the conflict. Some were recruited by their parents into the parental violence. Others witnessed a sibling get triangulated. Getting involved sometimes helped to limit the abusive parent’s violent behaviour. At other times, it made the fighting worse. The participants also spoke about some of the complex feelings that they had to deal with, as part and parcel of being triangulated. As the women grew up, triangulation in their family of origin’s dynamics continued to be a persistent and challenging process, especially if the parental conflict was ongoing or unresolved. The women’s experiences strongly suggest that this process needs to be paid attention to in clinical practice both when working with families where there is domestic violence and also when working with childhood survivors of domestic violence

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Notes

  1. In this research, the term domestic violence is understood as encompassing all acts of physical, sexual, psychological or economic violence between members of the family or domestic unit, irrespective of biological or legal family ties. This definition is according to article three of the Council of Europe Convention on preventing and combating violence against women and domestic violence, dated the 12th April 2011.

  2. The words “ domestic violence” and “domestic abuse” are used interchangeably.

  3. In Grounded Theory, theoretical sampling involves selecting participants according to specific characteristics as the data collection progresses. (For more detail, see Charmaz, 2014).

  4. All names are pseudonyms.

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Authors and Affiliations

  1. Faculty for Social Wellbeing, Department of Family Studies, University of Malta, Room 244, Old Humanities Building, Msida, Malta

    Clarissa Sammut-Scerri

  2. Vid Specialised University, Vinderen Oslo, Norway

    Arlene Vetere

  3. Faculty for Social Wellbeing, Department of Family Studies, University of Malta, Room 243, Old Humanities Building, Msida, Malta

    Angela Abela

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  1. Clarissa Sammut-Scerri
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  2. Arlene Vetere
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  3. Angela Abela
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Correspondence to Clarissa Sammut-Scerri.

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Sammut-Scerri, C., Vetere, A. & Abela, A. Looking Back on Childhood: Women’s Experience of Triangulation in the Context of Domestic Violence. Contemp Fam Ther 42, 259–270 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10591-019-09530-9

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