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The Sexual Relationships of Sexual-Minority Women Partnered with Trans Men: A Qualitative Study

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Abstract

This qualitative research study examined the experiences of sexual-minority women in romantic and sexual relationships with female-to-male transsexuals (N = 20) using grounded theory analysis. This article reports data on issues related to sexual desire and practice in the context of a partner’s transition, which participants said often compelled a process of renegotiating bodies and sexual connection. Participant reports on the influence of transition on the couple’s sex life were mixed. Many participants discussed changes in sex which were negatively affected in the course of transition by a lesbian sexual orientation and a personal trauma history, and positively affected by a more embodied partner and a partner with increased libido. More general changes to the nature of their sexual life are detailed, including a greater dependence on heteronormative gendered sexual scripts as transition began.

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Notes

  1. Cromwell (1999), Devor (1997a), and Rubin (2003) reported that a significant number of FTMs have had “lesbian careers.” With the increased visibility of, and available resources for, transsexual men, more genetic females with significant gender conflicts who perhaps previously mistook themselves for lesbians are deciding to transition.

  2. Transsexuals are often motivated to pursue changes in order to bring their physical bodies in line with their sense of gender. Rubin (2003) argued that, for transsexuals, the notion of a core self is tied to the idea of “expressive errors” and “the belief that their bodies fail to express what they are inside is the central tenet legitimating their transitions” (p. 149). In this way, transition is not simply about social recognition, but a means “to be recognizable to themselves” (Rubin, 2003, p. 151), that is, “a project in self-realization” (p. 152). The process of transitioning is complex, and can be open-ended or unfinished for years sometimes. Transitioning can include a social and/or medical process. Social transition may include a change in name, pronoun use, and presentation such as clothing, hair, and for FTMs, chest binding. Medical transition may include hormone replacement therapy (for FTMs, testosterone), and some form of sex reassignment surgeries (for FTMs, including bilateral mastectomy and chest contouring, hysterectomies, and/or genital surgery of various forms such as metoidioplasty, phalloplasty, or scrotal implants). What constitutes “transition” and its completion is contested, and aside from legal definitions, may vary by individual. SRS is difficult to access and is accompanied by high costs, which may be prohibitive even when some aspects of it are covered by health plans. Other reasons trans men may not pursue SRS include strong self-identification, a physical disability, religious prohibitions (Lev, 2004), and/or dissatisfaction with the current sophistication of surgery (Cameron, 1996). Trans subjectivity (i.e., self-identification) can also exist independent of transition status. The inclusion criteria of the research study are in no way meant to challenge the authenticity and legitimacy of trans identities independent of transition. Decisions around inclusion criteria were made in order to ensure a public role transformation that would have social implications for partners.

  3. Two of the interviewees made their primary income from sex work. Participants denoted “criminal” to draw attention to the criminalization of their labor from an institutional perspective, and to the particular stigma and risks their employment carried.

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Acknowledgements

This author wishes to gratefully acknowledge Dr. Sandra Pyke as her past advisor and to thank Dr. Aaron Devor and the reviewers and the Editor for their helpful feedback on the article. This research was generously supported, in part, by a doctoral SSHRC grant.

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  1. Department of Psychology, York University, Toronto, ON, Canada

    Nicola R. Brown

  2. Central Toronto Youth Service, 65 Wellesley St. East, 3rd Floor, Toronto, ON, M4Y 1G7, Canada

    Nicola R. Brown

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Correspondence to Nicola R. Brown.

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Brown, N.R. The Sexual Relationships of Sexual-Minority Women Partnered with Trans Men: A Qualitative Study. Arch Sex Behav 39, 561–572 (2010). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-009-9511-9

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