01-02-2015 | Original Paper | Uitgave 11/2015 Open Access

Interparental Violence: Similarities and Discrepancies Between Narratives of Mothers and Their Children
- Tijdschrift:
- Journal of Child and Family Studies > Uitgave 11/2015
Introduction
Method
Participants
Type
|
N (%)
|
Frequency
|
N (%)
|
Duration
|
N (%)
|
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Physical
|
30 (83)
|
Daily/Weekly
|
25 (69)
|
>5 years
|
23 (64)
|
Psychological
|
36 (100)
|
Monthly
|
7 (19)
|
1–5 years
|
12 (33)
|
Sexual
|
10 (28)
|
Yearly
|
4 (11)
|
<1 year
|
1 (3)
|
Procedures
Measures
Data Analyses
Discrepancies in
|
Type of violence
|
Age child
|
||
---|---|---|---|---|
Mild to moderate
|
Severe to very severe
|
<16 (
n)
|
≥16 (
n)
|
|
Exposure
|
||||
Child’s exposure
|
33 % (6)
|
45 % (9)
|
39 % (9)
|
40 % (6)
|
Role mother
|
50 % (9)
|
20 % (4)
|
44 % (10)
|
20 % (3)
|
Explanatory factors
|
||||
Problems father
|
71 % (12)
|
85 % (17)
|
73 % (17)
|
80 % (12)
|
Child functioning
|
||||
Abuse: psychological
|
50 % (9)
|
25 % (5)
|
48 % (11)
|
20 % (3)
|
Abuse: physical
|
17 % (3)
|
50 % (10)
|
39 % (9)
|
27 % (4)
|
Coping behavior: avoidance
|
28 % (5)
|
30 % (6)
|
22 % (5)
|
40 % (6)
|
Problems: internalizing problems
|
61 % (11)
|
40 % (8)
|
44 % (10)
|
60 % (9)
|
Problems: externalizing problems
|
22 % (4)
|
5 % (1)
|
13 % (3)
|
13 % (2)
|
Parental functioning
|
||||
Support and control
|
22 % (4)
|
35 % (7)
|
30 % (7)
|
27 % (4)
|
Results
Narratives Referring to the Period of Interparental Violence
Interparental Violence and the Exposure of Children
Mother: The children never saw it [the violence]. (27, Dutch)Child: It happened in the kitchen, it started with calling names, and then he hit her. (Girl, 14, Dutch)
Mother: It [the violence] was really focused on me. (32, Hindustani)Child: My father hits, but my mother is far worse. When she starts screaming, everybody hears her. (…) When my father asked for money, I heard my mother yelling and calling my father names. Then she kicked my father out of the house. My mother hit my father, and my father hit my mother, but he could not handle her. He is too scared. (Boy, 11, Hindustani)
Explanatory Factors for Interparental Violence
Mother: We did not find it necessary to tell the truth about my partner’s gambling addiction.Interviewer : Did you have a specific reason for not telling your children the truth? Mother: Yes, I think that the children need not to know about their father’s mistakes (…). He is very important to us. (33, Turkish)Child: I do not think it is normal for a man with money to go to a coffee shop. That is already a problem. Interviewer: What do you think what a man does with that money? Child: I think gambling. (Boy, 13, Turkish)
Child Abuse and Child Functioning During the Period of Interparental Violence
Mother: He [father] gave them nothing, absolutely nothing. (56, Surinamese-Antillean)Interviewer: Were you a victim of or involved in the violence? Child: Mm, no. (Girl, 21, Surinamese-Antillean)
Mother: For a while, he was not allowed to hit me. Therefore, he tried to hit my daughter. However, I said: ‘if you touch her, I will kick you dead totally.’ Interviewer: So he never hit her? Mother: He never had the chance to hit her, because I told him. I said, ‘If you touch my children, you touch me’. So he did not dare. (35, Moroccan)Child: He, eh …always hit me. When I was around six, there was a spider in our shower. And, eh … I woke him and asked him “would you please get it out of the shower,’ but he did not want to. I started crying and, eh… then he became angry and he just pulled my nose very hard, so it started to bleed. (Girl, 12, Moroccan)
Interviewer: So the children did see that he was banging on the door?Mother: Yes, when they were bigger, (…) the children opened the door and said: ‘Dad, get out!’ (56, Surinamese-Antillean)Interviewer: When there were problems, what did you do? Child : Oh, then I left. (Girl, 21, Surinamese-Antillean)
Parental Functioning During the Period of Interparental Violence
Mother: What was not allowed was not allowed. It was not that the children were allowed to do more when they asked me or their father. That has always been a straight line. (38, Dutch)Interviewer: What kind of punishment did you receive? Child : That I had to stay in my room when I was not in school. (…) Interviewer : And what did your mother think of that? Child: She did not like it, when my father was gone she called me down. (Boy, 14, Dutch)
Mother: Parenting did not go well. (…) I did not even know what parenting was, because I was struggling with my own problems. (…) I really did not give my daughter attention in terms of parenting or education. (42, Turkish)Child: They didn’t fail in our upbringing; they did give everything to us. (girl, 19, Turkish)
Narratives Referring to the Period After the Interparental Violence
Child Functioning After the Period of Interparental Violence
Discrepancies in
|
Type of violence
|
Age child
|
||
---|---|---|---|---|
Mild to moderate (
n)
|
Severe to very severe (
n)
|
<16
|
≥16
|
|
Child functioning
|
||||
Coping behavior: disclosure child
|
11 % (2)
|
10 % (2)
|
9 % (2)
|
13 % (2)
|
Feelings: sadness, anger, fear
|
6 % (1)
|
15 % (3)
|
13 % (3)
|
13 % (2)
|
Feelings: afraid for the future
|
6 % (1)
|
15 % (3)
|
4 % (1)
|
20 % (3)
|
Feelings: distrust
|
33 % (6)
|
30 % (6)
|
22 % (5)
|
47 % (7)
|
Problems: parentification
|
17 % (3)
|
10 % (2)
|
13 % (3)
|
13 % (2)
|
Parental functioning
|
||||
Atmosphere
|
22 % (4)
|
10 % (2)
|
22 % (5)
|
7 % (1)
|
Support and control
|
30 % (5)
|
45 % (9)
|
43 % (10)
|
26 % (4)
|
Mother: My daughter felt that I had to stand up for myself. (…) She will never accept a man treating her like that. (49, Hindustani)Child: You do become afraid of it, because you start to think, but it depends on your man. Interviewer: So you are afraid that the same will happen to you? Child: Yes. (Girl, 16, Hindustani)
Parental Functioning After the Period of Interparental Violence
Mother: It is calmer now. (40, Turkish)Child: We have more time for each other and do more things together; in the past, we did not want to do these things. (girl, 18, Turkish)