Anticipating the Division of Labour during the Transition To Coparenthood: A cross-national Qualitative Study

The study was conducted by a cross-national team of researchers, with data collection and coding undertaken by team members in each country. We recognise that researchers’ backgrounds (e.g., gender, professional training, cultural location and own experience of parenthood) can shape interviewing and interpretation. To support reflexivity, we used memoing after interviews, regular cross-team debriefs, documented coding decisions, and bilingual checks during translation; discrepancies were resolved through discussion and consensus. These procedures were intended to surface assumptions about gender roles and national policy contexts and to enhance the trustworthiness of the analysis. A series of data analysis workshops was conducted among the teams to foster a shared understanding of the coding approach and themes. While the selection of questions to be analyzed from the broader interview guide was based on the research goal, the full interviews were read in their entirety by the coders. This ensured that all selected responses were interpreted within the broader narrative context of each participant. For team discussions and for presenting quotes in the English-language manuscript, bilingual team members translated selected excerpts and thematic summaries into English. To preserve original meanings, translators provided interpretative notes alongside raw translations, explaining any culture-specific terms or contexts. Furthermore, whenever an English translation of a quote or code was discussed, at least one native speaker from the respective country cross-checked it for accuracy and nuance. Where necessary, wording of translated quotes was slightly adjusted to best capture the original intent. The Portuguese team first performed a thematic analysis on this sample of interviews, guided by the research questions and following the six-phase approach proposed by Braun and Clarke (2006, 2021). This included becoming familiar with the data, generating initial codes, searching for themes, reviewing and refining themes, defining and naming them, and producing a report. Each interview was read in the native language and independently coded by two researchers. An initial set of codes was developed collaboratively and discussed between the coders, from which a summary document with translated excerpts of key quotes and proposed themes emerged. A workshop was then held where the teams engaged in extensive verbal discussion in English to define each code, and discrepancies in interpretation were resolved collaboratively. This process helped to promote a balance between retaining culturally specific meanings and maintaining a coherent coding structure across countries. Following these discussions, some modifications were introduced to simplify the coding system. Each country team continued coding in the native language of the interviews (i.e., Finnish, Japanese and Portuguese) to minimize the loss of nuance through translation. Once the coding system was finalized, all teams applied it to the full set of interviews and prepared a summary report in English. Initially, all tasks, household chores and childcare responsibilities, were treated under the broader category of “division of labour.” However, as the analysis progressed, it became clear that participants often distinguished between types of tasks, sometimes emphasizing specific childcare activities (e.g., playing or bathing the baby) while minimizing or omitting household chores (e.g., cleaning or cooking). These distinctions were retained in the final themes and highlighted where relevant in the discussion section of this paper, especially when they reflected gendered patterns in task allocation. Because some interviewees were partners, we clarify that the unit of analysis was the individual interview. Introducing a dyadic layer would require a distinct analytic framework (e.g., linking partners’ interviews and coding dyadic agreement/discordance) and was beyond the scope of this cross-national study of 180 interviews focused on cross-country comparability. Mothers’ and fathers’ perspectives are summarised at the group level by country. We prepared this report in accordance with the Standards for Reporting Qualitative Research (SRQR) and provided a completed checklist (Appendix B) mapping items to manuscript pages.

Many expectant parents highlighted personal factors, such as health, personality traits, and individual preferences, as key influences on how they planned to share tasks. Participants often emphasized that considering each partner’s personal circumstances and characteristics would lead to a more workable and satisfying division of labour. For example, one Portuguese father-to-be noted that his partner’s chronic health condition would require him to take on more physically demanding baby-care tasks: “It will already be difficult for (my partner) to pick (the baby) up alone, to bathe her… due to her health problem. So I say we will do it together, never (her) alone.” (‘Filipe’, Portuguese father-to-be). In this case, the couple’s plan for caregiving was directly shaped by an individual health issue, with the father anticipating stepping in to alleviate the physical burden on the mother.

Individual personality preferences were also frequently mentioned as a guide for task allocation. Couples across all three countries explained that aligning responsibilities with what each person is naturally “good at” or enjoys would make parenting and housework more manageable. Many described a desire to play to each partner’s strengths to reduce stress and conflict. One Portuguese expectant mother illustrated how her own personality traits informed her expectations, explaining:

…I’m always much more paranoid and meticulous about things. It’s always been in my nature. It’s a role he would never occupy. … I’m one of those extremely irritating people, and I know that there are things that can only be done well if they are done by me. (‘Irene’, Portuguese mother-to-be)

Similarly, a Japanese father-to-be anticipated a trial-and-error approach where tasks would be divided according to competencies: “We will try and see how the division of housework goes. Based on who is good at or bad at what, we could divide housework.” (‘Makoto’, Japanese father-to-be). A Finnish mother-to-be expressed a comparable expectation that certain childcare duties would naturally fall to the parent who was more inclined or interested in them: “…there are preferences: the other likes to do something, and the other less, then that affects how we divide household work. … My partner is interested in some things in care and bringing up, like playing with the child. … I anticipate that these will then go to him.” (‘Elsa’, Finnish mother-to-be). Notably, some participants acknowledged that these personal “preferences” often aligned with traditional gender norms. For instance, both women and men in some Finnish interviews commented that because women like to do most of the cleaning, the female partner would likely assume primary responsibility for cleaning tasks. In such cases, what seemed like individual choices or talents could actually reflect broader cultural expectations about gendered roles.

Another personal influence on anticipated arrangements was the interplay between complementarity and similarity in partners’ personalities. Across all countries, some couples believed that differences in temperament would help them balance childcare and housework (i.e., complementarity), while others felt that sharing similar traits or values would make cooperation smoother (i.e., similarity). Both approaches seemed to offer expectant parents a sense of reassurance in managing upcoming responsibilities. A Japanese mother-to-be described how her and her husband’s contrasting dispositions would be an asset in parenting:

We have very different personalities. My husband is not easily agitated. He stands tall and thinks everything will be fine. I, on the other hand, analyse everything, thinking this could happen and that could happen, minor possibilities included. … Our personalities seem to complement each other. (‘Mio’, Japanese mother-to-be)

In contrast, some couples highlighted the value of similarity in personality or mindset. For instance, a Finnish mother-to-be noted: “It is in the best interest of the child to have two equal parents.” (‘Anna’, Finnish mother-to-be). Whether through complementary traits or shared attitudes, couples derived confidence from their relational dynamics. They anticipated drawing on each other’s strengths—either through contrast or alignment—as they navigated the transition to parenthood.

Beliefs about gender roles and equality significantly shaped how participants envisioned dividing childcare and domestic tasks. While many couples across Finland, Japan, and Portugal expressed support for gender equality, their accounts sometimes revealed implicit traditional assumptions. This theme highlighted tensions between stated ideals and ingrained norms, with some plans reflecting subtle expectations about “men’s” and “women’s” roles. In Finland, discussions of anticipated arrangements were often framed around egalitarian attitudes. One expectant mother from Finland explained how she and her partner had proactively talked through their values and fears about an unequal burden falling on her shoulders:

…we’ve had to share all the responsibilities so far. We discussed it already before we tried to have a child. I fear that the sole responsibility would fall on my shoulders. I am not really career-oriented now or anything, but because I have put in the effort to be educated, I think we should share parenting equally. We have discussed this a lot. (‘Liisa’, Finnish mother-to-be)

Some Finnish participants even mentioned a desire to “do things differently” from their own parents and to redefine fairness in their relationship. In a few cases, this meant envisioning a reversal of typical gender roles. As one Finnish mother put it, “…We have no gender specialized work, or if we have – we only have shared tasks and male tasks” (‘Johanna’, Finnish mother-to-be), indicating that in their household they deliberately did not designate any duties as “women’s work.” In line with this, Finnish fathers-to-be also voiced their rights and intentions to be equally involved. One father emphasized that caregiving should not be seen as solely a mother’s domain:

…it’s as much a man’s right to stay at home with the child. It has been somewhat surprising to many (that we think like that). We both value equality and want to have an equal footing, or at least aim for that. We are attentive not to accidentally slip into such [traditional] stereotypes. (‘Leo’, Finnish father-to-be)

In Japan and Portugal, ambivalence was more evident. Expectant parents often voiced egalitarian ideals while simultaneously acknowledging or accepting a more traditional division of roles, due to social pressures or practical realities. Some Japanese and Portuguese participants strongly wished for equality but anticipated challenges in achieving it. A Japanese father-to-be expressed a personal determination to break away from the old-fashioned model of fatherhood he associated with earlier generations, saying, “I do not want to be a father of the Showa era (1926–1989); I want to be involved in my child’s life… I’ll make time (for my child) on weekends and at night and make sure to spend time with her. I don’t want to leave everything to my wife.” (‘Naoki’, Japanese father-to-be). His resolve illustrates an aspiration toward a more involved paternal role than what he perceived as the norm in the past. However, many Japanese parents-to-be also recognized the constraints of societal expectations on their plans. Traditional workplace cultures and social norms in Japan make it difficult for fathers to reduce work commitments, which in turn affects couples’ arrangements. As one expectant mother explained, “It is not easy for my husband to work fewer hours as such an idea is not well accepted in Japanese society. If that is the case, then I think I should do it as I am a woman, making arrangements must be easier.” (‘Yui’, Japanese mother-to-be). This comment reflects how personal beliefs in equality can be overridden by external pressures.

Portuguese participants voiced a similar mix of progressive and traditional views. One Portuguese mother-to-be observed the ongoing cultural shift, noting both progress and remaining hurdles:

We are getting closer to a society that favours [gender equality] more. But we have a very recent history of dictatorship. Even when parents wanted to do certain things, they couldn’t because of the shame of not being socially accepted or judged. (…) This is undermining the way coparenting exists. We are getting closer to the right way, but there are still a lot of these ideas about what the man can or cannot do and what is the woman’s role or not. (‘Carina’, Portuguese mother-to-be)

This quote highlights how deeply rooted norms, reinforced by relatively recent historical contexts, continue to influence expectations for mothers and fathers, despite a general trend toward more equal views.

Some couples firmly rejected the notion of the mother as the default primary caregiver and insisted on an equal partnership. For instance, another Portuguese mother strongly criticized the common phrase that implies fathers only “help” with children: “I think the statement that ‘the father has to help’ is very bad. For me, the father doesn’t have to help, the father has to participate just like me. He doesn’t help me. He does as I do.” (‘Carla’, Portuguese mother-to-be). A Japanese mother-to-be similarly argued against the idea of the father as a mere helper, stating that each parent “should take initiative in child rearing… It is not that he helps me. He should take initiative in child rearing. That is ideal.” (‘Asahi’, Japanese mother-to-be). These voices underline a desire for true co-parenting, where both parents see themselves as equally responsible leaders in raising their child. In contrast, in both Japanese and Portuguese contexts, other expectant parents conveyed more traditional or biologically oriented beliefs about gender roles. These participants, while not outright opposing equality, often assumed that women might be naturally better suited for certain tasks, especially in the early stages of the baby’s life. A Portuguese father-to-be, for example, remarked, “…Inside the home, naturally, the woman has a better notion of what needs to be done.” (‘Jorge’, Portuguese father-to-be), implying an intrinsic female aptitude for managing household tasks. Along similar lines, some fathers noted the unique role of mothers due to biology. A Japanese father-to-be reflected on his biological limitations and the need to adjust expectations accordingly: “My wife is the only person who can breastfeed our baby. I can do physically demanding housework like bathing a baby and changing diapers. (…) We have to adjust how we cooperate as we do.” (‘Manabu’, Japanese father-to-be). Here, the father acknowledges that certain aspects of infant care are inherently the mother’s domain, whereas he sees his role in more supportively “physical” tasks.

Connected to these ideas, many couples across Portugal and Japan expected that the mother would initially have a stronger bond with the newborn and might even become more “possessive” of the baby in the early months. This was often attributed to the special mother–infant connection through breastfeeding and constant contact. In Portugal, most fathers-to-be who mentioned this possibility did so without resentment, treating it as a natural dynamic. At the same time, a few mothers-to-be voiced concern that their close bond with the baby could inadvertently limit the father’s involvement. One Portuguese mother noted delicately, “Mothers tend to be… I don’t want to use an unpleasant word… But eventually even more possessive about this relationship with the baby, also because of breastfeeding.” (‘Alexandra’, Portuguese mother-to-be). This comment suggests an awareness of how maternal attachment might lead to gatekeeping or exclusion of the father, even if unintentionally.

Moreover, some mothers-to-be in Japan openly preferred or expected to handle most childcare themselves. One Japanese mother admitted, “To be honest, I don’t want my husband to intervene in how I raise the child. I would prefer to raise a child in the way I like.” (‘Yui’, Japanese mother-to-be). Another expectant mother from Japan anticipated being solely responsible on weekdays: “We have not divided housework/childrearing. After all, I will be the only one who takes care of everything on weekdays.” (‘Sara’, Japanese mother-to-be). These perspectives show that despite desires for equality, a number of women in the study were prepared to (or even preferred to) assume a traditional primary-caregiver role, either due to personal choice or the practical expectation that it would end up that way.

Across all three countries, one common thread in these gender attitude narratives was an emphasis on achieving a fair division of labour, even if that did not always mean a strictly equal split at every moment. Many expectant couples talked about “fairness” in terms of each partner contributing according to their capacity or time availability. For instance, a Japanese mother-to-be reflected that she was comfortable doing a larger share of chores given her husband’s long work hours, as long as they both recognized each other’s efforts:

Frankly, I will do a lot of housework and child rearing activities (…). I think it is okay. … If he comes back home late, then I want him to do what he can do with that constraint… It’s difficult to explain but if both of us acknowledge each other’s contribution, then I am fine with that. It is not about what percentage of housework I do or he does. (‘Mari’, Japanese mother-to-be).

Likewise, a Portuguese mother-to-be who planned to work part-time (while her husband worked full-time) expected to take on more baby-related tasks simply because she would have more free hours in the day. She reasoned that a perfectly equal split made little sense in their situation:

When I go back to work, I’ll be part-time, he’ll be full-time. So I think that the tasks connected to the baby, I have to be able (…) to do more. I have more free time, I can sleep more, rest more. It doesn’t make sense to split it 50/50, when one of us has more of an overload outside. He needs time to rest. (‘Inês’, Portuguese mother-to-be).

A Finnish mother-to-be similarly acknowledged that the division of responsibilities would likely shift at times depending on who was at home: “I believe that the collaboration will be good. There will be, for sure, those periods when the other one is at home with the child, then that will affect the responsibilities at home.” (‘Elsa’, Finnish mother-to-be).

In summary, while ideals of gender equality were prominent in participants’ discourse, their ultimate goal was an arrangement perceived as fair and workable for both partners. This often meant accepting an imbalance in duties during certain periods, such as when one partner had heavier work commitments or a newborn required maternal care, as long as both partners were contributing in line with their abilities and time. Especially in contexts like Japan and Portugal, where fathers frequently face long working hours and mothers take extended parental leave, couples emphasized mutual understanding and flexibility over rigid equality.

Beyond personal attributes and attitudes, a range of contextual factors shaped how couples anticipated dividing their roles. These external influences included the availability of family support, cultural practices around childcare, workplace policies, and broader work–life arrangements. Participants’ narratives show that the social and economic context in which they live can either facilitate or constrain their desired division of labour.

One major contextual influence was support from extended family. In all three countries, many parents-to-be expected to receive help, both practical and emotional, from their families, especially from female relatives such as their own mothers and mothers-in-law. This kind of support was often mentioned spontaneously in the interviews, underscoring how integral family assistance is to new parents’ plans. For example, a Finnish mother-to-be anticipated significant help from her nearby mother, saying: “…I get most help from my mother who lives in [rural municipality]. We are really close. She’s really excited about this newborn.” (‘Helena’, Finnish mother-to-be). Here, ‘Helena’ expresses confidence that her mother will provide both hands-on assistance and emotional encouragement once the baby arrives.

Japanese couples similarly highlighted the role of family networks. One Japanese father-to-be explained that they even chose where to live with the expectation of nearby family help:

(When you need some help, who would you ask? ) “I guess my parents and step-parents.”

(Is there any preference? ) “Well, my wife’s parents live relatively close to us. We will ask them first.”

(When you chose where to live, did you intentionally choose the current place because it was closer to your wife’s parents’ home? ) “We chose the one that was closer to my wife’s parents.”

(Did you think about getting some help for childrearing? ) “Yes, that was part of the reason.(…)” (‘Kenta’, Japanese father-to-be).

In ‘Kenta’s’ case, having his in-laws nearby was seen as an important resource that influenced both their housing decision and their confidence going into parenthood. Another Japanese mother noted that both her own parents and her in-laws stood ready to help when needed: “Both my and my husband’s parents live relatively close (…), they will help us whenever necessary.” (‘Kaori’, Japanese mother-to-be).

Despite the general expectation of family support, the extent of help available varied among participants, and some faced challenges due to geography or family dynamics. A number of couples noted that living far from close relatives would limit the assistance they could count on. For instance, a Portuguese mother-to-be who did not have family nearby worried about coping without that extra help: “We don’t really have a family member close by that can provide extra support. (…) a lot will fall on our shoulders.” (‘Rita’, Portuguese mother-to-be). Again, in Japan, even when distance is an issue, cultural practices offer some solutions. It is common for new mothers in Japan to engage in “Satogaeri,” meaning returning to one’s parents’ home for the late stages of pregnancy and the postpartum period. One Japanese father shared that, because he sometimes has to work nights and knew his wife might be overwhelmed alone, they planned for her to go stay with her parents for a short time after the birth: “My wife’s parents’ home is near our home. I must work night shifts sometimes. It could be overwhelming for my wife, so I suggested that she should do Satogaeri.” (‘Haruto’, Japanese father-to-be). This arrangement shows how cultural norms and family support systems intersect to help manage the transition to parenthood in the context of demanding work schedules.

On the other hand, in Portugal, a few participants expressed a desire to set boundaries with extended family to protect their new nuclear family’s autonomy. They were cautious about interference or unsolicited help from relatives. For example, one Portuguese mother-to-be anticipated that an over-eager grandparent could disrupt their own parenting process:

“One of the factors that might [influence our organisation] is how intrusive our family might be… I don’t want one of the grandmothers to come along and say ‘no, I want to do it!’ and take the child away and that’s it. Neither me nor the father want that… Or that old idea of grandparents thinking that it should be the woman who does some chores…” (‘Jéssica’, Portuguese mother-to-be).

While appreciative of family support, ‘Jéssica’ clearly valued the couple’s independence in defining their roles, free from older generational stereotypes. This sentiment, though not widespread, suggests that in familistic cultures like Portugal, where extended kin are often closely involved, support can sometimes become overinvolvement (Silva & Matos, 2004). In such contexts, the risk of enmeshment (i.e., blurred generational boundaries and limited individual autonomy) may be more pronounced. Interestingly, while couples in Japan also operate within a collectivistic framework, they did not express this concern spontaneously. This may reflect cultural differences in how hierarchy and boundaries are managed. In Japan, clear role expectations and vertical social structures may reduce overt conflict or the need for explicit boundary-setting (Hofstede, 2001; Roland, 1988). Thus, although both Portuguese and Japanese families emphasize interdependence, the ways in which support is offered and negotiated differ culturally, shaping how autonomy is experienced during the transition to parenthood.

Expectant parents in Finland, while somewhat less explicitly familistic than those in Japan or Portugal, also mentioned drawing not only on their mothers and mothers-in-law but also on a broader support network. They talked about getting help or advice from siblings, friends, and other families with young children. Often, friends were seen as sources of moral support and shared experiences, whereas parents were expected to provide more tangible help. As one Finnish mother explained, “Well from friends mostly emotional support. That means that I can share concerns and joys, but from my parents I guess I expect help… So if I need help, I can probably get concrete help.” (‘Hannele’, Finnish mother-to-be).

In summary, across the three countries, extended-family support influenced how couples imagined caregiving responsibilities, at times supporting their ideal of shared parenting, and at other times potentially reinforcing traditional, gendered divisions of labour. In Portugal and Japan, grandparents were often expected to help with childcare several days a week, reflecting long-standing familial traditions. While this support could ease mothers’ workloads, it sometimes reinforced gendered caregiving roles, particularly when grandmothers, rather than fathers, assumed primary responsibility. At the same time, increasing nuclearisation has reduced access to such help. In Finland, where public childcare is more accessible and families are often geographically dispersed, parents relied more on formal services but still valued practical and emotional support from family and friends.

Another set of contextual factors revolved around job security and the type of employment. Participants indicated that the stability of their jobs (i.e., permanent vs. temporary contracts) and the nature of their work (e.g., self-employed, academic, shift work) influenced how they planned their leave and division of duties. For instance, a Portuguese mother-to-be on a temporary contract in a training phase expressed uncertainty about her future work location and stability, which made it hard to plan for long-term childcare division: “The ideal would undoubtedly be to already have a (…) fixed and stable workplace in the long term. (…) I’m in training (…) so when I finish, I’ll have to apply for a position. And in about three years’ time, I don’t know exactly where I’ll be placed.” (‘Diana’, Portuguese mother-to-be). Her situation highlights how precarious employment can add complexity to planning family responsibilities, as the couple may not know what their work-life context will be a few years down the line. Self-employment or working in demanding professions was another theme. One Portuguese mother-to-be explained that because both she and her partner were self-employed, taking the full length of parental leave available to them would be difficult. They anticipated cutting leave short to return to their business:

“I won’t be able to take advantage of all my leave. So, I’ll take what is required by law, which is two months, and my partner will take another month. Then, depending on progress, we may have to give up the remaining time and resume working. (…) That (…) is a consequence of our life and of both being self-employed. If the scenario was different, either one or the other would take full advantage [of the leave].” (‘Catarina’, Portuguese mother-to-be).

Here, economic and career pressures clearly shape the planned division of leave. Despite valuing the time at home with the baby, the couple feels constrained by their work situation to shorten that period.

In Finland, where social policies generally support parental leave, participants still noted differences based on employment conditions. For example, one Finnish mother-to-be, who had a secure public-sector job, planned to take a substantial leave, whereas her partner’s temporary job meant he couldn’t be away for very long. She reflected on how a more secure job for him might have allowed a different arrangement: “Well, I have a permanent employment relationship. That means that I can leave and be with [the baby] for a certain period of time without any problems from my employer (…). Then again [my partner] is temporarily employed and he cannot be away for a longer period. But if [my partner] had a similar job to mine, a traditional one, I would definitely divide the parental leave differently.” (‘Eevi’, Finnish mother-to-be). This illustrates how even with progressive leave policies, the realities of one’s specific job (e.g. fear of contract non-renewal or workplace pressure) can influence how couples divide that leave and, by extension, early childcare duties. Especially in Japan, workplace culture and policies were frequently mentioned as limiting fathers’ involvement at home. While Japan has been expanding paternity leave policies on paper, cultural uptake has been slower. Some Japanese fathers-to-be described navigating their company rules to take at least some time off around the birth. One father recounted his surprise and relief upon discovering that his company was more accommodating than he expected: “I looked up the company policy, and it said that I can take a parental leave a few weeks before and after the expected date of birth, so I took it early… I have heard that a man took one year of paternity leave. I did not know before, but my company has a generous policy.” (‘Yamato’, Japanese father-to-be). Yamato’s experience shows a hopeful side: with supportive company policies, some Japanese fathers are beginning to make use of parental leave entitlements. However, it was clear that such cases are still noteworthy exceptions. More commonly, Japanese (and to some extent Portuguese) fathers expected to have very limited time off, which in turn meant their partners expected to handle the bulk of childcare during those early months.